I’ve always been kind of surprised at people saying that they didn’t quilt for months after the death of a loved one. Quilting has such therapeutic value – who wouldn’t lean on this hobby during emotionally trying times?

My Dad passed away last month. Everyone has been very kind and supportive, even people who aren’t usually big fans of mine. Those offers of support (both expected and unexpected) have been so heartening. But sure enough, both right before and after his passing, I couldn’t bring myself to quilt much.

Every step of the quilting process felt like it took more focus to complete than I could offer. I didn’t feel up to cutting out pieces to the right size, or laying them out in the correct configuration. Making simple choices like which block to do next or which fabric to use seemed insurmountable. I was just not feeling up to the task (any of the tasks) for over a month.

But I really wanted to get back to quilting, and I found an unexpected ally in a process that I’m not usually a big fan of: appliqué. For my first block back, I chose an appliqué triangle. I figured that, for all that I disliked doing it, appliqué was just not that complex. You lay the pattern piece on the fabric, trace around the edge, and cut it out. Then you draw the stitching line, pin the piece to the background fabric, and stitch along the line. It’s the quilting equivalent of paint-by-number kits.

And sure enough, it got me going again. It’s definitely not my best work (don’t look too closely at that diamond at the top, or you’ll realize how lumpy and misshapen it truly is), and I wish I’d started attaching pieces at the top of the triangle instead of the bottom. By the time I got to the last piece at the top of the triangle, there was so much weight at the bottom of the triangle from all the other attached appliqué pieces, that it made it really awkward to hold steady in order to stitch around that tiny diamond.

But clearly a paint-by-number style of task was just what I needed to get the ball rolling again on this quilt.

As I work on these blocks, I’m always thinking of the people in my life and how they have contributed to this project. A quilty friend offering fabric to use or suggestions on how to approach a difficult block; a family member I’m visiting with while stitching that block; or my grandmother, who inspired me to take up quilting in the first place. I feel like so many people are stitched into the fabric of this quilt, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

This block’s for you, Dad.